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responsibility for any opinions expressed here.

MY LIFE IS WORTH FIGHTING FOR



The decision to kill has prompted many changes in my life. The killing that I am 
referring to is the decision to use lethal force, in self-defense, if I ever need 
to. Luckily I have never needed to. But I do not know when or if I might become a 
victim to violence. For this reason I have trained in self-defense. 

My decision to learn self-defense skills started in my early twenties. With violence 
being more and more present in everyday life, I felt I needed to protect myself. First 
I had to ask myself, "Could I kill or seriously hurt someone to stop them from killing 
or seriously hurting me?" I was able to answer yes to this question. If I could not 
have answered yes, there would have been no reason for me to pursue any type of 
self-defense training. As I started to learn, I realized that mindset was by far 
the most important aspect of self-defense, not guns, knives, or any type of martial art.

Mindset covers many things, awareness, ruthlessness, and aggressiveness to name a few. 
Awareness is simply being aware of your surroundings. When I go to a restaurant the first 
thing I do, after being seated, is look for the exit. Knowing where the exit is guarantees 
me an escape route if I need one. If I can run from violence I will. There is nothing about 
my manhood that I need to prove. I look around as I am pulling up to places like an ATM to 
make sure there is no one suspicious hiding out. If I see someone or something suspicious 
I will drive away. I look through the windows of a store before I walk in to make sure the 
store is not being robbed or something of that nature is happening inside. A lot of people 
walk right into the middle of an armed robbery because they do not pay attention to their 
environment. Every fight that I can avoid is a fight that I win.

The way I look at ruthlessness and aggressiveness is simple. Having another man’s nose in 
my mouth is better than having my family’s tears in my casket. I know this sounds very 
awful, but if I am fighting a drug addict or some other unsavory type of person for my 
life, being awful is better than my being dead.  I will, and I feel everyone should, refuse 
to be a victim. "The born fighter’s refusal to give up as long as he can still remain on his 
feet and lift his two fists." (Catton, p.406) I feel that if I am in a fight I must fight 
with everything that I have.  My life is worth too much just to give it to someone without 
aggressively fighting for it.

To improve my self-defense skills, I realized I needed to stay in good physical condition. 
I exercise often and try to eat right. My main reason for this is because someone the size of 
Arnold Schwarzenegger will never be mugged. I say this jokingly, but I do feel that if I am in 
good physical shape I will not look like an easy target to a criminal. Exercise allows me to 
walk with a head up shoulders back type of posture. I do not walk around with an attitude, just 
with a look of confidence. Also, if I am in good physical shape it will make me less likely to 
get injured in a violent attack, and more likely to recover if I do get injured.

I have had to learn, develop and understand tactics. Self-defense tactics can basically be 
defined as, using all available means to an acceptable end. Opening up my mind to see weapons 
of opportunity gives me more options. Options that the average mugger or thug does not realize. 
If I have to run over a car-jacker to stop him from killing me, I will. If I have to use the 
cushion out of my airplane seat to fight off a knife-wielding hijacker, I will. I have learned 
that a weapon of opportunity can be almost anything, ink pens, car keys, rocks, sticks,the list 
goes on and on. The main thing is that even if I do not have a gun or knife with me, I am never 
truly unarmed.

Skill is very important in self-defense. Any tool that I plan on using for self-defense I must 
develop a proficiency level of skill with it. I have always loved guns, so it was simple for 
me to choose guns for my main fighting tool. But I found out there is a big difference in shooting 
guns and fighting with guns. I see a lot of people make the mistake of buying a firearm and then 
feeling they are able to defend themselves with it. It is simply not that easy. I have had too 
spend a lot of time and money learning to fight with guns. I have received a lot of training and 
have put in uncountable hours of practice. I am now skilled in fighting with knives, pistols, 
shotguns, rifles, and I also have basic hand to hand fighting skills. My level of skill with a 
firearm is enough that I am now certified by the state of Tennessee as a firearm instructor. I 
currently, as a part time job, instruct for Options for Personal Security, a Florida based
company that offers self-defense training all over the United States. This job allows me to 
travel across America and teach people life saving self-defense skills, which may one day 
save their life.

Equipment is the thing that a lot people pay the most attention to. Through my training, I have 
learned that equipment is the least important when it comes to self-defense. Basically any gun 
will shoot you and any knife will cut you. This does not mean that I have not purchased quality 
equipment. It just means that a few determined people with cheap box cutters can kill several 
thousand people, like the hijackers in the recent terrorist attacks did. Attacks like this are 
the reason I carry a handgun. My Tennessee handgun permit allows me to legally carry a handgun 
in eleven sates, and I fully take advantage of this permission. 

Carrying a handgun on my person is not comfortable, but it is comforting. The people who do 
not understand self-defense think that I am some type of armed vigilante lunatic. This view of 
me could not be more wrong. I try to explain to these people that there are three main reasons 
that I have trained in self-defense. The first reason is because I feel the worst thing that 
could ever happen to me is to watch someone be killed or seriously injured and not have a way 
to prevent it.  I simply could not live with myself if I had to watch a child be murdered because 
I did not know what to do or have the means to stop the attack. The second reason is to have the 
means to stop someone from killing or seriously injuring someone else. Having to kill someone 
would definitely change anyone’s life. I just feel that I could live with taking the life of a
murder rather than having to watch a murder take place. The third reason is to be killed or 
seriously injured myself because I did not have a way to prevent or stop an attack. I will run 
from an attack if I can, but if I cannot run, I want to have a way to prevent it.

Some people have told me that I carry a gun because I am paranoid. I tell these people that I am 
prepared, not paranoid. I do not wear a seat belt because I am paranoid. I wear it because I do 
not know when or if I might have I car wreck. This is the same reason I carry a gun. I do not 
know when or if I might become a victim to violence. 

I am now thirty years old and have never had a violent encounter. I believe this is because 
of the lifestyle changes I have made. The greatest self-defense skills that I have learned are 
the skills to avoid, de-escalate, and detour violent encounters.


Barry Yeager